I tried to find a photo of “mean neighbors�, “nosey neighbors�, or even “asshole neighbors� to accompany this post, but was unsuccessful.
So picture, if you will, some of the nastiest, evil spirited folks, maybe in hillbilly get-up holding a pitchfork and maybe having horns. This is what I picture when I think of the group of jackasses in this otherwise wonderful neighborhood.
The latest in this string of things is that we are no longer allowed to park in our driveway and have to resort to finding street parking, even though we pay over seven thousand dollars in taxes each year.
I’ll back up. Our house is situated on the corner, so our driveway is not really in the alley like everyone else on the block, but it is parallel to the alley. It’s a small area that was built when people drove horse and carriage and not cars, so the driveway leading up to the garage is shorter than most. Because I cannot park in the garage (Greg gets the one spot because he has a nicer car, whatever, don’t get me started on that!) I have to park in the driveway. In doing so, my car overlaps the sidewalk a bit.
One walking down the sidewalk would not be shoved too far out of his or her way unless the person was 5 feel wide. Really, it’s maybe a few steps toward the street to avoid the car.
About a year ago some nosey jackass (female, if the writing is any indication) put a note on my car saying something to the effect of, “Do not park here, this is not your driveway, you’re going to get a ticket� or something like that. Well, even though this was nowhere near official, it was written on a Kowalski’s Comment Card, I felt like maybe I should worry about it. Maybe I would get towed. This was pretty soon after we moved in so I wasn’t sure of all the rules.
So I called the City. I got transferred to many different departments until I got one person who assured me that even though the sidewalk was not my property, the driveway was, and as long as it didn’t cover too much of the sidewalk I could park there. He said, “I can’t imagine anyone caring about that! No meter person would give you a ticket. If they haven’t yet, they won’t� So I continued to park there.
I also noticed that our neighbors across the street have this same set up and they park like this all the time. With two cars and presumably no problems.
Greg’s car has been parked there too lately because the garage is full right now.
Yesterday, Greg left and there was a meter person there, telling him that we were going to get a ticket if we didn’t move it. The person was nice enough, but the bottom line was that someone complained, so we have to move the cars. I guess he made it sound like it would be fine if no one had complained. But someone did.
So I moved the car. Then I called the City again. I got the traffic department who said that no, I was no allowed to park there. I said that I was previously told I could. She said that, well, then that person who told me that didn’t know any better. Then she said, “In fact, we just got a call about that this morning. A woman called to say that her mother fell and broke her hip because she had to walk around a car parked like that.� I said to the woman, “Well, that’s too bad, but a person can slip and fall on the sidewalk whether they have to side step a car or not, the car has nothing to do with it, right?.� She said, “Well, I don’t know, all I know is you can’t park there.� Or something to that effect. She said that even though I pay a fortune in taxes I have no parking.
After I hung up the wheels started turning. I’ve realized that this is the work of a nasty neighbor who, for some reason, does not like us and is trying to get us in trouble, or to move.
Here’s what I’ve come up with:
I’ve gotten two notices about this parking situation (one informal, one formal) while my neighbor across the street has gotten none. She is still allowed to park that way. Anyone who walks by my house likely would have to walk by hers as well. So why is mine a problem and not hers?
Whomever the ass is who called the City, clearly made up that story. Firstly, what is a broke-hip-potential-person doing walking down the street before 9am?� there is no one that fits that description (no one older than 60) that lives in the area, so what would she have been doing there? It just doesn’t fit. I could see it, if it were a day that the synagogue down the street had services or something, but this was a quiet Monday morning.
Secondly, Pu-leeze, if you’re going to come up with a story to get someone in trouble, don’t use the oldest cliché in the book. Old Lady Breaks Hip? Come on, be a little more creative. That story doesn’t even put me at fault. Like I said, taking two steps to the right isn’t going to be the reason someone falls.
This is the second issue that we’ve gotten complaints about. The first was right after we moved in. Someone called Animal Control to complain that the dogs were excessively barking one night, and that we were ignoring them. We were outside and the dogs were with us. Someone walked by the fence, which really startled them, and they barked. I tried to stop them and it continued. This means that whatever was on the other side of the fence was continuing to do whatever it was they were doing that was upsetting the dogs. The dogs didn’t bark for more than 1 minute. But it happened more than once that night. I now believe they were being goaded. Animal Control was called, they came out and there was no barking, of course. We got a note on the door telling us that a neighbor had called but that there was no citation because there were no dogs barking.
I now believe that this is the same person that is doing all of this. I do know many of my neighbors and they’re all wonderful. While at first thought the dog thing may have been our next-door neighbors, I no longer think that’s the case. They came to us (me) and said they didn’t like the dogs (Murphy, really) barking at them when they leave and come home. We’ve since talked about it and they’re fine. Or at least they said they’re fine. So I think it’s someone else.
I am really tempted to find out who it is and sue them for harassment. I just don’t know how I’d find out. I’m sure neither the City nor Animal Control will tell me.
Know any private detectives?
At least I can rest easy knowing that I have not done anything to this person and therefore they are at fault and Karma is a bitch.
Posted under Uncategorized
This post was written by Amy on December 13, 2005
